We
have been home just over 7 weeks! What
an incredible time this has been! Of course I wish I had written down
everything that has happened, but I didn’t. I love my laptop, but really had
enough of it, after dragging it on my back throughout my 2 week trek to
China and back!!! I haven’t spent much time on it aside from making sure our
bills are paid, and THANKFULLY THEY ARE!!!
Mason,
Michael, Morgan and Maddox are doing great together! There is a balance in the
house that I anticipated, but seeing it here and now is just incredible to
witness front and center. Aside from the
language barrier, Michael has found his place.
He has all the qualities I had read about, yet was told time and time
again, not to believe…I knew he was empathetic, kind and loving. I knew the Lord did all the leading and we had
to do all the following…Follow we did and OUR lives will never be the same!
THANK YOU JESUS!! Thank you to my parents and Matt’s parents for instilling our
Savior in our hearts so many years ago!
Again, as I have said over and over like a broken record (whoa that
makes me old! Record!!), this has been all about trust and faith in our Lord.
Trust doesn’t mean that I have not had moments of fear, or even doubt, because
I have, but I recognize when I’m having a moment, and know that Satan is trying
to get in front of me. I know no matter
what, my Lord won’t drop me! EVER!! Ever so thankful for that knowledge!!!
Please
bear with me as I try to recall and recap the last 7 weeks!!! I’m going through pictures to trigger the
memory! Jiminy Christmas I am only 44! Wait a minute!! What has happened to my
brain? What?? Did I say 44??!! I meant to say 34!! That is really how I feel, aside from the
aches and pains, and the bird’s feet that that are making their way across my
face with parenthesis!! That’s all fine, because I am here and having a great
life and nothing a few b12 shots, and ibuprofen can’t take care of…sorry for
the side bar but I do like to have a few laughs to myself and with others in
the midst as I write…
So
seriously here goes my attempt at a 49 day recap since the last one was through
July 9th! Brace yourself,
this one may go into the “Novelette” category, which is between 7,500 and
17,500 words….we shall see….(interruption!!
Now that I started this post a
while ago, things have changed and I will not be writing that long…I will try
to cut to the chase of some of the events that have happened, because life
keeps happening and I just can’t get it all down!!) sooooo here we go...
After,
my last post it was time for Michael’s first dentist appointment EVER!! In
China, going to the dentist is a luxury, one not afforded to children in orphanages
or foster care. I had noticed upon
meeting our son in China that he had great teeth although LOTS of buildup of
STUFF that wasn’t going to be taken care of in general brushing. He brushed his teeth just fine, but don’t
know about toothpaste he had used, if any, and certainly no flossing was
happening! He was a champ! The dentist was actually going UNDER the gum
line with that REALLY SHARP instrument, and he couldn’t believe Michael was
letting him…X-rays indicated he had 4 cavities, I really thought one of his
teeth was completely bad, but the dentist said he could save it. We set up the
appointments to do 2 and 2. Two on one
side, then the next week, the two on the other side.
After
the dental cleaning appointment, the 6 of us went to a local restaurant for a
bite to eat. It was funny when they said, “Ray, party of 6.” WHAT?? Oh my goodness, that was the first time
for that!! YAHOO! God did it ! We did it!!! SIX!!! I was so excited to hear that & I had to share with the hostess that
that was the first time anyone had said, Ray, party of 6 and that we had only
been home 5 days from China. That led
into chatting with the Manager in training who happened to be the golf coach
for the Chinese golf team in the 2008 Olympics.
After lunch we were off to introduce Michael to Matt’s mom (Grandma
Darlin’) and his step dad, (Granddaddy).
Granddaddy was so excited to finally meet his newest grandson, and
Margie was too, although she really doesn’t understand since she has
Alzheimer’s. Their caregiver gave
Michael a little USA beanie baby bear.
It bore a little American flag and Michael said, “Sssank you!”
Translated, Thank you! (we are continuing to work on the “Th” sound).
The
next afternoon we were having my dad and Betty Lou (my step-mother) over, along
with Dennis and Elizabeth (my sister and her husband) and a couple of my dad
and Betty Lou’s friends over for a cookout and to meet their new
grandson/nephew. Poor Elizabeth! She had
been SOOOO patient waiting to meet him!!
She wanted to come over Monday and we had a day to rest, but I wasn’t
sure how everything was going to go, so we planned things for later in the
week. It was great! (Most people that
know me know that I am not a fancy girl. I don’t have cloth napkins or fancy
plates…choice between cloth napkins and shoes for my kids, the shoes will win
every time) we just had burgers and hot dogs, “Joann’s baked beans” (really
yummy!) verte medley salad. It was then
that I was even more thankful to have been able to skype while in China.
Michael had already met Grandpa, Bu and Elizabeth (Beedo), so it was an easier
transition in person, not so intimidating for him. He doesn’t intimidate too easily
though…Michael was able to show off some of his very new swimming skills to
everyone. Quite impressive for any child, let alone, one that had never been in
a pool until June 28th.
On
the 14th, our friends Dana and Craig, and their son Nate came over
for a visit. Dana was so helpful in helping me fill out preliminary paperwork
for the adoption, way back in September last year!! There were so many questions to answer, what
will you do if this, what will you do if that, what kind of services can you
provide, and on and on…Thankfully my sweet friend knows about services since
she works for an agency that provides support for foster and adoptive families,
so she knows who can help in different scenarios. I am happy to say I do not need those people
that we discussed!!!Thank you God for protecting and watching over Michael as
he waited ALL THOSE YEARS for a family!!! Thank you for bringing all these
people together and finances together for us to bring him to our home and
family!!! I am thankful he was cared for and loved. I am grateful for the love he received and
that he was prepared to receive our love in return.
Back
to the visit with Dana and Craig and Nate...Dana had expressed that she wanted
to meet him before we showed up at church the next morning since HER flood gates would open. This is not a big deal
to me since it happens almost every Sunday (and other days) for me! REMEMBER, I
FEEL EVERYTHING! I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, I am blessed and was
given the “gift of tears.” I am thankful for them, and no longer feel
embarrassed about them. After the years
and years of people saying (and still saying), “Are you crying again?” or, “Are
you crying?” I’m over it…I am grateful that I can release my emotions, whatever
they may be, through tears…Don’t get me wrong, I can LAUGH TOO!!! And look out if my sisters and I get tickled
about something at the same time and can’t stop! It reminds me of our momma…She could get
going and have a hard time stopping too! Our daddy does it too! I miss her so
much, actually more, as time passes…I know she is great and with our Lord and I
will see her again, but I would have loved to have seen her see all of us and
our families…I know she would be proud! WAH!!!!
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| My momma |
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| Dana and Michael |
The
next morning we went to church. We
explained (beforehand) to Michael the events of the day through the electronic
translator. It helps the day if Michael knows what is happening, which is a
challenge for this momma since I fly by the seat of my pants most days! The
days escape me and I have intentions on doing some things that just don’t get
done!! But church is always on the agenda on Sundays, what a way to begin a new
week!! Once again, I was so thankful to have had our church experience in
Guangzhou. I was so grateful for the
young lady that took us to the pastor so Michael could hear about Jesus in his
country, in his language! I thought Michael would stay in church with us during
kids chapel, but he left! He wanted to
be a part of everything the children were doing, and that was ok by us…I am
thankful for his independence. At
communion, he was given a blessing, since he is not baptized YET!
The
week was full of swimming and laughter and trying to learn English…Most points
are able to be understood, although it does become a little trying at times. I
cannot imagine being Michael. I cannot
imagine being a young child and having to have the confidence and trust that he
has. I would imagine most adults could
not endure what he has, and his smiles remains mostly intact…
The
day after we arrived home from China, I checked our blue bird box in our yard…the
eggs had begun…I couldn’t wait to show Michael, he was amazed and was very
excited. I explained it would be a couple of weeks before they would hatch and
then we could watch them get bigger…I have SO MANY pictures and videos of the
broods that we have had over the last 3 years.
Morgan,
Maddox and Michael had a chapel service one night. Michael carried the lego cross in the
recession, and placed it in his room.
His heart is open to Christ which is an answered prayer!!!
The
boys have had sleep overs in each other’s rooms, during errands one day, I took
them to Mama Fu’s. Michael was excited to have some “noodles.” He has been
incredible with American food, doesn’t complain, and likes most everything we
have had at home. He isn’t a fan of
black beans, so he skips that on taco night (along with his brother Maddox, the
pick monster!!).
Our
end of the season swim banquet was a HOOT!!
This year it had changed and was an awesome, super time!! Moe’s catered it and everyone brought
desserts, there were a lot of desserts!!!
One of the board members wanted to introduce Michael and also share with
those who were unaware that we had adopted. I am not one that likes a spotlight AT ALL,
but they really wanted to so I allowed it.
YIKES, was I embarrassed!!.” Mary Ray, where are you?? Is she coming, “Well
let me tell you what the Ray Family has done…” He was very sweet, but I
honestly could not get out of that spotlight quick enough. Because, I have said time and time again,
this was not about us, it was and is all about God…as time passes, I am MORE
AWARE of how this is about HIM!!!! We are not “big people” because of what we
have done…we are just being obedient, trust me when I say this!!! Sharing
thoughts later….maybe not in this post....
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| Maddox Samuel (his first word was CHEESE!) |
So after all the trophies and awards were over, the music was blaring and the kids were all being silly…dancing beside the pool together and having a great time…it was mostly the ones approaching middle school…then Morgan and Maddox joined in, and then Michael!! You could not wipe the grin off of his face! He had so much fun and all the kids embraced him and were so sweet!! It was so incredible to see how everyone had taken to him and almost taken him under their wings…it was getting dark and the party was winding down…Since he has been here, he has gotten SEVERAL SHADES DARKER!!! I am used to looking for blond headed white boys, and looking for our new addition was challenging unless he was facing me and SMILING! We closed down the party, and got home and crashed!!
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| Morgan and Michael dancing by the pool |
Sunday
came and it was awesome!! We had a LPA (Little People of America) gathering at
our house. We were so excited to have
our group meet Michael. We had one of
the Orthopedic Surgeons from our Children’s clinic join us, as well as an Endocrinologist.
(A study is being conducted, none of us are participants.) All were amazed at how well adjusted Michael
is and also how he is such a “go with the flow kid.”
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| Miranda Uhl (Gold Medalist at 2008 Paralympics - 200IM), Morgan, Anthony and Michael |
August
2nd is a big day in the Ray house!!
It’s Morgan’s birthday!!! BIG NUMBER 10!!! He woke up before his birth
time…He wanted to take some pictures of his last moments of being 9!! Precious!!
What a sweetheart!! Everything to him is BIG!!
Every breath, every moment. He doesn’t
take too much for granted and is so thankful for God, Jesus and the Holy
Spirit!! That warms this momma’s
heart!! He has his first friend birthday
party. We do not do big parties, usually just family, or a dinner out, bowling
or go cart racing. The problem with the
go-carts is that he cannot ride a cart alone, so that is not so much fun
anymore… We had a pool party with pizza and cake and my creative husband did a “navy
seal training” obstacle course. What a trip! Then “Put the candle out with the
water gun!!!” The boys all had a great time, and watching them enjoying being
together was just too much!! The emotions hit me that night!! How can he
already be 10??? That is much too fast, and it seems to be going faster with
each passing year!!! Morgan opened all his presents later that afternoon. It
was a great day! Michael got to open several presents as well. A man who Matt works with had given Michael a
BUNCH of presents to welcome him to America!
We explained who they were from since we didn’t want him to think that
everyone gets gifts on everyone’s birthday!! We barely even do gifts around
here so we certainly don’t want that set up!!!
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| THAT'S A LOT OF BOYS!!! |
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| THAT'S TOO CLOSE!!! |
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| HE LOVED EVERYTHING!!!! |
I
had Morgan do all his thank you notes the next day. That night when I went to
pull my covers back on my bed, there was a note for me and Matt under my pillow…He
wrote a thank you note to us!!!
Michael
and I were in a the back yard one day…I had him get on the swing…I had seen
pictures of him on swings in China, but I do not know if they pushed him, or if
he just sat there…he clearly did not know what to do…I showed a couple of
times, and then he figured it out…he is very smart…he can pick up things
relatively quickly…
We
had the opportunity to take care of a baby!! My friend Lauren’s little baby,
not so little anymore…Oh my goodness, my boys were so excited! They love babies, and Asher is all boy and
tons of fun!! And musical!! I got to get out some old toddler toys that I kept.
I had planned to get him in the pool, but ran out of time…he had a nap, then
lunch and then we strolled down the street in the hot hot sun!! Michael can
change the color of a shirt in an instant.
Talk about sweaty!! He can sweat like nobody’s business!! Part of that
is because people with Achondroplasia sweat more (varied views on why that is),
part is something else, part is he is my son!! They all do it!!
The
7th found the Olympics in our home!!! They had soccer, and sword fighting. I can’t
remember who won, but it was insane. I just knew we were going to end up at the
ER…Praise the Lord we did not!!!
August
10th, we dropped by the radio station so Michael could meet some
MORE people!! He got a tour of
everything and missed getting to see our friend Coronette…she was an angel in
our paperwork. She notarized all our documents…she was happy to do it and
prayed with us along the way. We have
known her since before we were
married, that is a LONG TIME!!
Matt
showed Michael his studio and had played some of his voice over work for him…The
look on his face was priceless! He hasn’t
recognized him on the radio yet, but in time he will know from the first word, “that’s
my daddy!”
More
aunts and cousins to meet!! My sister, Anne and her teenage boys, Adam and
Emory (17 and 15) came for a visit! I
hadn’t seen the boys since last year, and hadn’t seen Anne since April. Oh my
goodness! What a great time for them to be here!! They get to see Michael at
the beach for the very first time!!! It’s my most favorite place in the world
and I was so excited to share it with him…Matt showed him pictures of where we
go so he would be familiar with it…I took video as we were walking down the
walkway…too much for words when he hit the sand and his smile and the wind
blowing his brown straight as a board hair…the way he would run and jump on the
wet sand so he could see his footprints…the water rushing up on him and
splashing up his entire body….still so many firsts to experience when adopting
an “older” child. We missed so much, but
we will witness more than we can imagine…Still working on building some muscles
on him…I still do not know what kind of activity he had in China, but I do not
think it was much…as he tried to carry the buckets or water or sand, he would
get a little frustrated…it’s ok, he knows he has to work on his strength…he
loved collecting shells. We have all of them that he gathered that day to place
in some kind of container for memories of his first visit to the beach…no beach
day could be complete without a dip cone!! But Michael has decided that he
doesn’t like chocolate…that’s funny because he eats a lot of things with
chocolate!! I haven’t figured out which
chocolate is ok, and which is not, but whatever he doesn’t want I WILL TAKE!!
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| MADDOX AND MY SISTER, ANNE,ALMOST 3 YEARS OUT FROM HER HEART TRANSPLANT!! THANK YOU JESUS FOR THE TECHNOLOGY THAT SAVED MY SISTER'S LIFE!!! |
On
our way home from the beach, the storm started brewing…I was taking pcitures of
the sky as we drove home…I was commented how I was in such awe of the Lord’s
creation of our world…how could anyone not believe that He made ALL OF
THIS???!!! EVERYTHING!!! If you just look around you, how everything works
together! How our bodies work together to create life! My heart aches when I
think of Michael’s birth mother and father, but mostly his mother…I have to shy
away from the thoughts as it can take me to such a painful place…I still have
to think it is was out of love that he was left in a public place so he could
be found and given an opportunity of life…I am thankful that we are a part of
his life, and I am so grateful for the love he was given before coming to our
family….back to happy stuff....
We
had a cookout with Anne and her boys, and watched the closing ceremonies of the
Olympics…a surprise visitor arrived during that time and we were thrilled. My
friend Mary and her daughter Ruth were in the neighborhood and thought the y
would drop by. They had yet to meet Michael and were leaving town the next
morning…It was a great visit…I had visited Mary in the early stages of this
adoption way before we went public with our “crazy” news. I showed her his picture and told her he was
going to be our son, Lord willing. She
immediately prayed with me. She can throw down a prayer like no other!! I love
to hear her pray! It is so soothing and
deep and priceless. I am grateful for
Christian friends…
August
13th…another big day in the Ray house…our ANNIVERSARY!!! 24 years!! I am so blessed to call this man my husband…all
the ups and downs that we have been through in this life…I cannot imagine going
through any of it with anyone else! I
laugh at how our story began, our “meeting.”
It is truly amazing that God put us together…I love him with all my
being and am blessed beyond words for the life we have built together with
Christ in the center of it. He has been so good to us!! We pray that we bring
glory to Him in all that we do…
Schooling
will be another post (OR SEVERAL) all together!!
THANKS FOR FOLLOWING OUR JOURNEY AS CHILDREN OF GOD!!!
THANKS FOR FOLLOWING OUR JOURNEY AS CHILDREN OF GOD!!!
